I don't know if you have noticed or not, but a while ago I took to always signing my blog updates the same way. "I love you more than anything in the world" has become the closing line of every post for at least the past 6 months. However now I need to change it. Not because I don't love you more than anything in the world, but because I found a new one I like better.
On Saturday morning I was standing in line at Starbucks and I picked up a copy of one of their CD's. I really don't remember which one it was specifically. However, it had a David Gray song on it I had never heard. since I am a big fan and I think he writes great love songs, I decided to buy it on iTunes. Turned out to be a very lucky stroke.
The song is incredibly romantic. So much so that i had to do some research on what it is about. According to David Gray it is a celebration of true love and fidelity. It appears that in 1995 he found the one true love of his life. She became his "muse" and his career took off. He says so many of the songs he writes simply start with a thought about his wife and bloom from there. I have to imagine this is one of them.
Here are the lyrics and some comments on how they apply to us.
"Started talking and the line went dead
Never heard a single word you said
Babe I said I’d give my right arm,
Every day that I decide on
Baby baby you’re the world to me"
** OK in as simple a terms as possible, I'd give you anything. even if it meant my right arm. And yes every day that goes by I decide you're the world to me
"I woke up, the room was cold
Looking tired, feeling old
Cursin’ all the changes I’ve to say
The more I cursed into the flood
The less it seemed do me good
Clearer became my mind than I could say
Baby baby you’re the world to me"
** I am not certain what he means, but the way he sings it gives you the feeling he might dislike being away from his wife and feeling alone when all you really want to do is be with your wife. I feel that way so often. How unfair is it that there are times when one of us has a bad day and then we have face the reality of being so far away from each other. I need you there - because baby you're the world to me.
"My head is roaring like a waterfall
Give me everything or not at all
You don’t have to turn the sound up
Babe I want you from the ground up
Baby baby you’re the world to me
Baby baby you’re the world to me
Baby baby you’re the world to me
Baby baby you’re the world to me
You don’t have to turn the sound up
Babe I want you from the ground up
Baby baby you’re the world to me"
** You don't have to say anything sometimes for me to know how much I love and want you. Sometimes you say so much without saying anything at all. You really have to be in love to hear that stuff that isn't said. You are all I want. Baby, you're the world to me.
"Iridescent like a starlet
Won’t you be my little darling
Baby baby you’re the world to me
Baby baby you’re the world to me
Baby baby you’re the world to me"
The song is romantic and simple. The way a good song should be. If you get a chance to listen to it you will hear what I mean. It is in his voice. In the end it simply reminds me how much I love you. How important you are to me. How you mean the world to me.
So as a result I an changing the sign off to my blog. Until further notice......
I love you, baby you're the world to me.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
The Life of the Party
Ok I figured out how to "save" and hopefully avoid last night's disaster in the future. I hope I come pretty close to what I typed up last night.
It dawned on me this weekend that we are fun. While we were at the "Wigs" concert (umm by the way I have seen "My Chauffeur" and I was right the girl from Valley Girl is its star) I noticed that we were as usual the life of the party (or certainly the group we were with). You paired up with one friend and I clearly saw you giggling with here. We both jumped immediately on the "shots for the neighbors benefit" game. We are just fun.
So it made me wonder about all the "fun" times we have had over the years. And frankly honey, our friends and family are going to have to step up their game. We have been leading most of their good times for 2 decades. We have lots of examples, but everyone features you and I leading the "fun" way for the people we hang out with. I guess being fun is one of those things that we not only do together on a regular basis, but something we share with as many people as we can.
I started to think about listing some of the "fun" we have had just the two of us. But I realized I had already kind of made that post a few months ago. Then I thought that I could probably make you smile pretty good if I took you down memory lane of other fun. I am going to add a rule to the walk though - only one memory per friend or family member. So I am hoping for the "BEST" fun experience form each. Otherwise our fiends in that urban sprawl nightmare city down south would have a list all of their own.
How about the oldest nephew. This one is easy. The time he tried valiantly to impregnate our new home. To this day I can't remember a site quite like that. He wasn't even that old at the time, but man was he "groovin" on that wall. This is the only event that gets 2 mentions.
It get two because it also happens to be the most fun we have ever had with your sister. One time in her whole life she really let her hair down. I have no idea how much we drank that night. I am certain that we have had bigger binge evenings both before and after that night, but this one is maybe the most memorable. I find it funny tot his day how important this date was to our nephews. But man was it funny. we had some pole dancing, a disco stage at the top of the stairs, smoke stack nephew and finally your sister in the spa in her underwear. Hasn't been a family event like this one before or since. The best part was how impromptu the night was to start.
The middle nephew is easy. We have him to our house for an important family event. We take him to dinner with the WHOLE family. He drinks too much. We wind up just the 4 of us late at night doing a somewhat responsible thing - decorating for the big day. What do we get? The most classic video in family history. Enough said. (He gets an honorable mention for the flurry of drinks he ordered while in the DR with us as he experienced his first "all you can drink" - but he quickly ruined it the next day!).
The girls get a couple of mentions for things that don't involve drinking. I will list the dance rehearsal involving the hustle. The impromptu "slap" dancing event. Then there are many, many Sing Star or Rockband events. We have great fun with them don't we?
The youngest nephew has too many to count. He really is an important part of our family (not that the other aren't, but he has been around way more than they were). I m going to settle on two. You and him rocking out to "Rocket Man" (you both so rock that) and the David Hasselhoff McDonalds event. So funny. So much fun.
A couple of quick hits before I list the most fun with our best friends:
* Soccer coach seeing the rows of bottles when he walked int he back yard at 2AM
* You saving our friend form the weirdo dance partner at the annual Halloween party
* Any of a variety of time sat the Starck Club - my favorite is how memorable we made "Brass Monkey" and the invention of the "Sex On the Beach" drink or the Lemon Drops
* The one fun night at the uppity neighbors who have never had us back - what fools
Finally - I thought long and hard about the most fun we ever had with the bets friends. Frankly we can't take all the credit on them as they remain our near equals in this category. However, the most fun event may actually have been very early on in our friendship. The Edge Birthday Party's rank high, but they aren't my number one. The long nights of game playing and you cheating you both to wins over the "guys", but they aren't number one. Tennessee first night - still not number one. So i am going with the 4th of July when you guys ha us looking for the "daytime" fireworks. That one day includes so many memories of fun. The trip to the grocery store you two made, the search for the fireworks and the night of fireworks viewing followed up by blasted Mexican radio. Man have we had good times with them.
So there you have it - a historical list of the fun we bring to people. I didn't even include the litany of your high school stories. Wow. We are the life of the party aren't we?
I love you more than anything in the world.
It dawned on me this weekend that we are fun. While we were at the "Wigs" concert (umm by the way I have seen "My Chauffeur" and I was right the girl from Valley Girl is its star) I noticed that we were as usual the life of the party (or certainly the group we were with). You paired up with one friend and I clearly saw you giggling with here. We both jumped immediately on the "shots for the neighbors benefit" game. We are just fun.
So it made me wonder about all the "fun" times we have had over the years. And frankly honey, our friends and family are going to have to step up their game. We have been leading most of their good times for 2 decades. We have lots of examples, but everyone features you and I leading the "fun" way for the people we hang out with. I guess being fun is one of those things that we not only do together on a regular basis, but something we share with as many people as we can.
I started to think about listing some of the "fun" we have had just the two of us. But I realized I had already kind of made that post a few months ago. Then I thought that I could probably make you smile pretty good if I took you down memory lane of other fun. I am going to add a rule to the walk though - only one memory per friend or family member. So I am hoping for the "BEST" fun experience form each. Otherwise our fiends in that urban sprawl nightmare city down south would have a list all of their own.
How about the oldest nephew. This one is easy. The time he tried valiantly to impregnate our new home. To this day I can't remember a site quite like that. He wasn't even that old at the time, but man was he "groovin" on that wall. This is the only event that gets 2 mentions.
It get two because it also happens to be the most fun we have ever had with your sister. One time in her whole life she really let her hair down. I have no idea how much we drank that night. I am certain that we have had bigger binge evenings both before and after that night, but this one is maybe the most memorable. I find it funny tot his day how important this date was to our nephews. But man was it funny. we had some pole dancing, a disco stage at the top of the stairs, smoke stack nephew and finally your sister in the spa in her underwear. Hasn't been a family event like this one before or since. The best part was how impromptu the night was to start.
The middle nephew is easy. We have him to our house for an important family event. We take him to dinner with the WHOLE family. He drinks too much. We wind up just the 4 of us late at night doing a somewhat responsible thing - decorating for the big day. What do we get? The most classic video in family history. Enough said. (He gets an honorable mention for the flurry of drinks he ordered while in the DR with us as he experienced his first "all you can drink" - but he quickly ruined it the next day!).
The girls get a couple of mentions for things that don't involve drinking. I will list the dance rehearsal involving the hustle. The impromptu "slap" dancing event. Then there are many, many Sing Star or Rockband events. We have great fun with them don't we?
The youngest nephew has too many to count. He really is an important part of our family (not that the other aren't, but he has been around way more than they were). I m going to settle on two. You and him rocking out to "Rocket Man" (you both so rock that) and the David Hasselhoff McDonalds event. So funny. So much fun.
A couple of quick hits before I list the most fun with our best friends:
* Soccer coach seeing the rows of bottles when he walked int he back yard at 2AM
* You saving our friend form the weirdo dance partner at the annual Halloween party
* Any of a variety of time sat the Starck Club - my favorite is how memorable we made "Brass Monkey" and the invention of the "Sex On the Beach" drink or the Lemon Drops
* The one fun night at the uppity neighbors who have never had us back - what fools
Finally - I thought long and hard about the most fun we ever had with the bets friends. Frankly we can't take all the credit on them as they remain our near equals in this category. However, the most fun event may actually have been very early on in our friendship. The Edge Birthday Party's rank high, but they aren't my number one. The long nights of game playing and you cheating you both to wins over the "guys", but they aren't number one. Tennessee first night - still not number one. So i am going with the 4th of July when you guys ha us looking for the "daytime" fireworks. That one day includes so many memories of fun. The trip to the grocery store you two made, the search for the fireworks and the night of fireworks viewing followed up by blasted Mexican radio. Man have we had good times with them.
So there you have it - a historical list of the fun we bring to people. I didn't even include the litany of your high school stories. Wow. We are the life of the party aren't we?
I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Untitled
Hi sweetie.
You probably won't believe this but I had a full entry all typed up (I was typing it most of the time we were on the phone). Then when I went to post the laptop froze and I lost the whole thing. I promise to re-type it tomorrow night and maybe even add a few things. But for now I have to get some sleep.
I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Undressed
What a terrific weekend we had. I enjoyed every minute with you. There is nothing better than enjoying your time with someone you love so much.
I was quite surprised when you advised me that I had never told you about the "naked" thing. To me it seemed so obvious. But I guess after 20 years together I am still baffled by your humility with regard to your beauty. I have been looking at you for more than 2 decades now and I still always enjoy what I see.
If you remember I used to make you listen to a particular song by Lloyd Cole. In fact TWO Lloyd Cole songs. Both remind me of your beauty and one is very relevant to this past weekends conversation.
The first song is "Perfect Skin" (Perfect Skin Video on Youtube). Here are some of the lyrics:
I know there are songs where you read something into the lyrics that may or may not be there, but to me there is a clear reference to how I have always seen you and what really attracted me to you. Do you remember that picture I had of you in the blue shirt/sweater and jeans sitting on the bed? You had such smoldering sexy eyes in that picture. An amazing sex appeal. You were smiling in a shy but sexy kind of way. Just the way you always did and always have - and still do. You looked perfect in your skin. You had "perfect skin".
There is kind of a dual meaning in this song. One that also made you more beautiful. I knew I was the first person you felt that comfortable around. The first person who had seen you more than just naked, but "undressed". It was really confirmation that you loved me. I was special in your life. I was in a place you had never let anyone else.
I knew that we would be together forever. It wasn't just the sex, it was the love. (ok not that I had any problems with the sex part). It was WE had become together. Honestly, it was when I really felt like we were more than a couple, but we were an "us".
So the next time you feel uncomfortable around me, or close that door, or make some comment about how you think you look in various stages of "undress" - think hard about what I see. I see so much more than your "perfect skin" or your body or even your face. I see you. I see you as part of me. I see you as who you are inside and outside. I see love.
I love you more than anything in the world.
I was quite surprised when you advised me that I had never told you about the "naked" thing. To me it seemed so obvious. But I guess after 20 years together I am still baffled by your humility with regard to your beauty. I have been looking at you for more than 2 decades now and I still always enjoy what I see.
If you remember I used to make you listen to a particular song by Lloyd Cole. In fact TWO Lloyd Cole songs. Both remind me of your beauty and one is very relevant to this past weekends conversation.
The first song is "Perfect Skin" (Perfect Skin Video on Youtube). Here are some of the lyrics:
she says turn on the light, otherwise it can't be seen
she's got cheekbones like geometry and eyes like sin
and she's sexually enlightened by cosmopolitan
when she smiles my way
my eyes go out in vain
for her perfect skin
yeah that's perfect skin
she's got cheekbones like geometry and eyes like sin
and she's sexually enlightened by cosmopolitan
when she smiles my way
my eyes go out in vain
for her perfect skin
yeah that's perfect skin
I know there are songs where you read something into the lyrics that may or may not be there, but to me there is a clear reference to how I have always seen you and what really attracted me to you. Do you remember that picture I had of you in the blue shirt/sweater and jeans sitting on the bed? You had such smoldering sexy eyes in that picture. An amazing sex appeal. You were smiling in a shy but sexy kind of way. Just the way you always did and always have - and still do. You looked perfect in your skin. You had "perfect skin".
The rest of the song really talks about how he has a crush on the weather girl on TV. Some random unobtainable person. While you weren't random at the time, you were sort of unobtainable. All I had was a picture. I had no idea I would ever get you back. But I knew how beautiful you were - it was evident in the picture and in your eyes.
I still remember you in the dress on our first date. I remember seeing you in a bathing suit for first time. I remember the purple and black dress. I remember the overalls. More than a few pairs of jeans that really showed your famous backside. I remember some of the suits you wore to work. The dress your wore at Sean's wedding. All covering your "perfect skin".
The second song is a bit different. I know you remember it, because I know you didn't really like the song. That's ok, it had real meaning to me. The song is called "Undressed". It is very fitting for our conversation this weekend. This one I show all the lyrics for, but I suggest you ignore the first line (I think he put it in there for rhyming purposes):
You look so good when you're depressed
Better even in your current state of undress
Tears caressing me like rain
And I'm not even thinking, I feel fine in your pain
The coolest thing I ever saw
You were sitting there smoking my cigarettes
You were naked on the bare stone floor
You looked at me to say don't guess
I was only watching, yes I love you more undressed
Is it really such a sin?
Should I feel some kind of shame?
Will I truly go to hell?
Oh you never lock the bathroom door
Should I be embarrassed when Ive seen a hundred times before
How do married couples cope
Should I say excuse me darling, I don't know
We could disconnect the telephone
Just sit around and mess around
And tell your ma we went to rome, tennessee
And I'm not even drinking, I feel fine, its scary
Is it really such a sin?
Should I feel some kind of shame?
Will I truly go to hell?
Oh well
The coolest thing I ever saw
You were sitting there smoking my cigarettes
You were naked on the bare stone floor
You looked at me to say don't guess
I was only watching, is it bad that I should love you best
Undressed
There is kind of a dual meaning in this song. One that also made you more beautiful. I knew I was the first person you felt that comfortable around. The first person who had seen you more than just naked, but "undressed". It was really confirmation that you loved me. I was special in your life. I was in a place you had never let anyone else.
I knew that we would be together forever. It wasn't just the sex, it was the love. (ok not that I had any problems with the sex part). It was WE had become together. Honestly, it was when I really felt like we were more than a couple, but we were an "us".
So the next time you feel uncomfortable around me, or close that door, or make some comment about how you think you look in various stages of "undress" - think hard about what I see. I see so much more than your "perfect skin" or your body or even your face. I see you. I see you as part of me. I see you as who you are inside and outside. I see love.
I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Resolution For a New Year
Well another year starts. By my count this is the 22 different "year" we have been together. Starting with dating in 1988 all the way through 2009. 22 different years. Wow. You have been my life for a long time. That isn't a typo, I meant you have BEEN MY LIFE (not in my life).
I usually don't have new years resolutions. I make some silly ones like losing weight, getting organized, etc. But I rarely follow through with them. Very few people ever do. So I guess I am not unique in that respect. This year I have a real resolution and an important one. So I must follow through on it. It involves you.
I think last year was a difficult one for our marriage. I am not sure why. We seemed to argue more than ever and we seemed to do it over very mundane things. The little arguments turned into bigger arguments. The bigger arguments turned into my pouting and feeling hurt. I think I spent more time feeling hurt by you in 2008 than in the previous 2 decades combined. It can't go on that way.
So what exactly is my resolution? Well it is simple. I want to make the most of every moment we spend together. I want to enjoy my time with you. I want to do things together and enjoy doing them. There you go. Resolution publicized.
So now we have to consider what we can do to help me achieve my new years goal.
A few of them are things we need to bring back from the past.
The first is coffee on Saturday mornings. We used to do this every week and for some reason stopped. I want to start that again. It was nice time we spent together. Even if it was just the drive to the Starbucks it was a planned time for just us. It is like 15 minutes a week that we can commit to us, I don't trying to squeeze 15 minutes in is all that difficult.
The second is lunch together on Friday. I have already blocked my entire year on Friday's at noon. I have made it clear to my new boss that I NEED to be home on Friday unless it is completely out of her control. I think this was also a nice thing we did together. It means both of us being ready to go at noon on Fridays. We had some nice talks at lunch. Ate some decent meals. It seemed to always give our weekend a "kick start". Hey maybe I will even let you treat me every once in a while.
Next we need to start "going out" more. I had such fun with you on Saturday night. We can go out with friends (we will need to get some more of those) or just go out alone. We can see a movie, go to a concert, see a play, take a drive, go shopping or whatever. It really doesn't matter we just need that time for just us - having fun. Making each other laugh is what we have always done best. We need to do more of it.
Finally, I need to start surprising you a bit more. Some flowers here, a card there or a note left in a conspicuous place. I think you deserve that. You deserve to be treated a bit more "special" than I did this past year.
So there you go. It is my plan for meeting my news years resolution. The best part is that I get to do it with you. Only you. That is really the time I enjoy most.
I love you more than anything in the world.
Happy New Year.
I usually don't have new years resolutions. I make some silly ones like losing weight, getting organized, etc. But I rarely follow through with them. Very few people ever do. So I guess I am not unique in that respect. This year I have a real resolution and an important one. So I must follow through on it. It involves you.
I think last year was a difficult one for our marriage. I am not sure why. We seemed to argue more than ever and we seemed to do it over very mundane things. The little arguments turned into bigger arguments. The bigger arguments turned into my pouting and feeling hurt. I think I spent more time feeling hurt by you in 2008 than in the previous 2 decades combined. It can't go on that way.
So what exactly is my resolution? Well it is simple. I want to make the most of every moment we spend together. I want to enjoy my time with you. I want to do things together and enjoy doing them. There you go. Resolution publicized.
So now we have to consider what we can do to help me achieve my new years goal.
A few of them are things we need to bring back from the past.
The first is coffee on Saturday mornings. We used to do this every week and for some reason stopped. I want to start that again. It was nice time we spent together. Even if it was just the drive to the Starbucks it was a planned time for just us. It is like 15 minutes a week that we can commit to us, I don't trying to squeeze 15 minutes in is all that difficult.
The second is lunch together on Friday. I have already blocked my entire year on Friday's at noon. I have made it clear to my new boss that I NEED to be home on Friday unless it is completely out of her control. I think this was also a nice thing we did together. It means both of us being ready to go at noon on Fridays. We had some nice talks at lunch. Ate some decent meals. It seemed to always give our weekend a "kick start". Hey maybe I will even let you treat me every once in a while.
Next we need to start "going out" more. I had such fun with you on Saturday night. We can go out with friends (we will need to get some more of those) or just go out alone. We can see a movie, go to a concert, see a play, take a drive, go shopping or whatever. It really doesn't matter we just need that time for just us - having fun. Making each other laugh is what we have always done best. We need to do more of it.
Finally, I need to start surprising you a bit more. Some flowers here, a card there or a note left in a conspicuous place. I think you deserve that. You deserve to be treated a bit more "special" than I did this past year.
So there you go. It is my plan for meeting my news years resolution. The best part is that I get to do it with you. Only you. That is really the time I enjoy most.
I love you more than anything in the world.
Happy New Year.
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