So I kind of lied this morning. I heard the whole Al/Tipper Gore thing on GMA. Sad that a couple that appeared so happy for so long is not longer together. But i listened closely and know why that will never happen to us.
The key driver from what I heard was that they “grew” apart as their interests in life changed. All went Hollywood and Tipper didn’t go along with him. I am certain that she found things around Tennessee to occupy her time and put her effort towards. But as they remained apart they started getting “different” interests. Separation is the hardest thing for any couple to deal with on a regular basis. Even after 40 years they apparently failed.
The reason I know this will never happen to us is that we put so much effort into being together. Not always physically, but always together. That we take such copious effort to make sure that we have the regular things in our lives that keep them connected. That keep us connected.
I am certain Al Gore traveled a ton. Time away from Tipper. I traveled too. But did Al make certain he was in his room at a certain time every night possible to have an appropriate good night call? Did All and Tipper ever watch a TV show with the phone attached to their ears together from 500 or 1,000 miles away? Was Tipper sharing with Al what they got in the mail everyday as though the mail was some kind of daily event? These little things always helped bridge our physical distance from each other and make us seem so much closer. So much more “together”.
The other way people start to grow apart is when they develop interests that don’t involve the other. We have never done that either. While we have some small things that we both “like” that the other doesn’t “like”. We always take interest in what the other is doing (no matter how painful it is for you). Even small things like “The Kill Your Husband” TV channel, or my stupid books or the music we like. We never let the other have a “completely separate” piece of their life. Not in a creepy way, but in a “we are in this together for the next 70 years, so I had better be interested” kind of way.
They talked about how Al and Tipper changed after the kids where all grown and out of the house. We have been preparing for this for years. It is the time you and I spend together that is most important. We love the girls and the times we spend with them are so memorable. But we have so many memories of just you and I. So many simple times with funny stories or classic situations. Our time together with just us has been as much a treasure as the time we spent as a family. Someday one of the girls will make a book/dvd of the times their parents had together. Kind of like the book of adventures in “Up”.
So I don’t worry about what happened to Al and Tipper happening to us. No matter how “happy” any other couple is they aren’t “us”. No couple is – nor will any ever be. I only hope the girls get and their husbands get close. Al and Tipper likely failed long ago at prioritizing their lives. We never do. We won’t fail. Plus they are democrats for god sake – failure was in their genes.
You’re the world to me. I love you more than anything in the world.
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