This is a really long week. rarely am I gone all 5 days and when I am the week seems to drag on and on. I miss you every minute of every day. I am sure you already know that but seeing it in print can't be a bad reminder.
I am reading this book about "the power of story". Frankly I didn't know what the book was about when I picked it up, but the topic kind of intrigued me. It is a leadership book where the author teaches people to write the story of their current lives and then reflect on that and write the story of their life they would really like to take place. I started to go through some of the exercises on the plane. List these 5 things, list those 5 things, etc. Then it hit me.
I like the story of my life. I like it a lot. The story I have now is the story I want told about me forever. My story is almost a fairy tale. It has been that good. Well the past 20 years have been that good anyway.
The fairy tale begins with you.
Once upon a time there was this prince. He didn't know he was a prince. Every day he toiled at his work taking calls from the evil travel agents. His nights were filled with bad dreams and dark tales. Every day was much like the day before. Every day seemed just a little more empty.
Then one day while the prince who didn't know he was prince was at his job he saw the girl of his dreams. She walked by like a vision. Flowers circled her head. The sunshine followed her as she walked by. A beautiful song played in the prince's head every time he thought of her. The prince knew he had to meet this vision of beauty.
Luckily the "kind of wicked" step sister decided to introduce the prince to the beautiful girl. Nervously the prince picked the girl up her house. She was amazing. The prince took the girl on a date and he was so happy. They saw a old couple dancing in the streets and they smiled. They ate a meal cooked by leprechauns (ok thats funny right?). They had a wonderful time. The prince took the beautiful girl home and gave the shared a magical kiss.
The prince and the beautiful girl spent all of their time together and were so happy. They laughed together and had so much fun. Until the really EVIL sister starting tricking the prince into thinking the beautiful girl was a witch. Confused the prince pushed the beautiful girl away. The EVIL sister had won and the prince was no longer happy. The prince tried to get away from the EVIL sister but couldn't.
The just before the winter came the prince caught a break. He was wounded in a battle and the beautiful girl called to find out how he was doing. The prince was so happy. He took the beautiful girl to the ball and he knew he could never let her get away again. He shunned the EVIL sister and pushed her into oblivion. He made the beautiful girl the most important thing in his life. He knew they would never be apart again.
From there every day was better then the last. The beautiful girl turned out to be a princess. The prince realized that with the princess he really was a prince. They got married. They had two beautiful daughters. They smiled. They laughed. The spent every day hopelessly in love. The spent every day blissfully happy.
Along the way they slayed many dragons. The fought off the return of the EVIL sister. They survived hard times. The built a castle together. They move to a new kingdom together. They watched their own little princesses grow into young ladies together. Their fairy tale got better and better.
And every day they lived happily ever after. Over and over again.
Baby You're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Is It Real? I Hope So.
There is this dream that I have every so often about you my love. Frankly it seems very very real. More like a memory than a dream. But as soon as I awake I cannot figure out when the dream occurred in reality. Maybe it did really take place, maybe it didn't, maybe it is an amalgamation of several memories in our lives all combined into one dream. Who knows. Maybe you will read this and tell me EXACTLY when it happened or if it never happened at all.
In the dream I can see you so clearly. You are much younger. Probably 25 or so. You were so gorgeous at that age, but still not as attractive as you were yesterday. I am so lucky that I am married to someone who ages so well and gets prettier every day. I am certain that few men still feel that way about their wives. I am certain that our daughters have no idea how lucky they are going to be to inherit that gene from the pool.
I can see what you are wearing in the dream. The short sleeved white t-shirt with the not too low collar that shows the necklace you always used to wear so perfectly placed above your...well you know. You are also wearing those so sexy denim overalls. The ones that well, if you remember, provided such "easy accessibility" and seemed to fall to the floor with such grace (oh am I a pervert or what?).
As they often were, your hands are in your pockets. Your arms at your side in that kind of shy "tight against your sides" manner. You stood that way so often. You kind of seemed like a "little girl" when you did that. Your elbows are turned in that backward kind of way and your feet are close together. You look so amazing. You have on your white canvas "Keds".
The funny thing is that in the dream we must have been caught somewhere in the rain. There is a large and very lush tree above us, but the sun appears to be shining. I know it must have been raining because you are wet from head to toe. Your hair has some curl to it, but it mostly just wet and a bit hanging in your face. Water is dripping from the small curls in your hair and falling onto your nose and lips. Your makeup isn't running, but it has an appearance that it is just about to do so.
The best part of the dream is your smile. It is one of your many smiles. It is that kind of "I am a bit embarrassed, but oh so sexy" smile. It is the second most lasting part of the dream. As always it is the best part of your amazing face.
Then it happens. Your kind of shrug your shoulders. Again in a very shy, but extremely sexy way. You step closer to me, out of the shade and the sun catches you just right. The water is still dripping off your face. You look up at me with the most amazing eyes. The appear darker and more sensual that usual. Maybe it is the light. Maybe your eyes have some kind of magical "mood" effects. Who knows. Then we kiss. A soft kiss at first. The a longer one. Slowly your hands come out of your pockets. You arms go around my neck. The kiss seems to last forever.
During the dream I can literally feel the entire experience. It seems so real. I feel warm. Then I wake up. Always at the same time, always wishing I would fall back asleep. Always reminded how lucky I am to have spent the past 2+ decades with such an amazing women.
I am not sure if this is a moment that ever really happened. If it did I was truly blessed to have experienced it. If it didn't, then the fact that I created it in my mind with you as the centerpiece reminds me how much I adore you. The fact that I re-create it so often reminds me how much I love you.
I can't wait to fall asleep tonight.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world.
In the dream I can see you so clearly. You are much younger. Probably 25 or so. You were so gorgeous at that age, but still not as attractive as you were yesterday. I am so lucky that I am married to someone who ages so well and gets prettier every day. I am certain that few men still feel that way about their wives. I am certain that our daughters have no idea how lucky they are going to be to inherit that gene from the pool.
I can see what you are wearing in the dream. The short sleeved white t-shirt with the not too low collar that shows the necklace you always used to wear so perfectly placed above your...well you know. You are also wearing those so sexy denim overalls. The ones that well, if you remember, provided such "easy accessibility" and seemed to fall to the floor with such grace (oh am I a pervert or what?).
As they often were, your hands are in your pockets. Your arms at your side in that kind of shy "tight against your sides" manner. You stood that way so often. You kind of seemed like a "little girl" when you did that. Your elbows are turned in that backward kind of way and your feet are close together. You look so amazing. You have on your white canvas "Keds".
The funny thing is that in the dream we must have been caught somewhere in the rain. There is a large and very lush tree above us, but the sun appears to be shining. I know it must have been raining because you are wet from head to toe. Your hair has some curl to it, but it mostly just wet and a bit hanging in your face. Water is dripping from the small curls in your hair and falling onto your nose and lips. Your makeup isn't running, but it has an appearance that it is just about to do so.
The best part of the dream is your smile. It is one of your many smiles. It is that kind of "I am a bit embarrassed, but oh so sexy" smile. It is the second most lasting part of the dream. As always it is the best part of your amazing face.
Then it happens. Your kind of shrug your shoulders. Again in a very shy, but extremely sexy way. You step closer to me, out of the shade and the sun catches you just right. The water is still dripping off your face. You look up at me with the most amazing eyes. The appear darker and more sensual that usual. Maybe it is the light. Maybe your eyes have some kind of magical "mood" effects. Who knows. Then we kiss. A soft kiss at first. The a longer one. Slowly your hands come out of your pockets. You arms go around my neck. The kiss seems to last forever.
During the dream I can literally feel the entire experience. It seems so real. I feel warm. Then I wake up. Always at the same time, always wishing I would fall back asleep. Always reminded how lucky I am to have spent the past 2+ decades with such an amazing women.
I am not sure if this is a moment that ever really happened. If it did I was truly blessed to have experienced it. If it didn't, then the fact that I created it in my mind with you as the centerpiece reminds me how much I adore you. The fact that I re-create it so often reminds me how much I love you.
I can't wait to fall asleep tonight.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Will you be my.....
Wow it is that time of year again. Time for the groveling, begging, pleading, hoping, etc. involved with me asking you to be my Valentine. So far I am 20 for 20. But will I be so lucky again this year? Will the gods shine upon me and grant me my annual wish? I guess I will know in a few short days.
You know I am not a fan of the "hallmark holidays". Personally I think the scheduled giving of the cards is a relatively lame way to show affection. A good randomly sent card for very little reason seems so much more appropriate and requires so much more thought. Valentines cards seem to be just a little bit different though. I gather it is an acceptable card giving holiday because in that card you are trying to express some kind of true feelings of love. I did some research and it hasn't always been that way.
Valentines cards started showing up in the 1800's. They were generally made by artists and showed pictures of children playing and gardens. The best part is that they were blank inside so that the sender could add his own sentiment. In 1913 the Hallmark Company took the "sentiment" part as its very own. Seems that today they have nearly 3,500 different Valentines sentiments. So I figured they had the perfect sentiment for me to share with you. Why make art when you can steal it right?
Well I read all 3,500 of them. Cover to cover. All 3,500. You may seem a roughly $8,000 charge on the checking account because they made me buy every one of them before I read them, but it is for a good reason so the charge is acceptable. And after all of that you know what I found out? They can't come up with the "perfect" sentiment for our relationship. In addition, I didn't want to risk them to breaking my 20 year streak of having you say "yes". So I had to come up with one on my own.
I figure I need a theme of some kind. Lets see.... We could go with your "outer beauty". How about something like "Your beauty is unparalleled. I could spend the rest of my life gazing into your amazing blue/gray eyes. Your smile creates a thousand faces, each more sparkling than the last. Be my Valentine so I can be a part of your beauty forever". You know what? As pretty as I think you are (and I still think you are the most beautiful thing ever) - that just doesn't cut it for me. With that one you still may say "no". I need a "yes".
Maybe we will go with the "inner beauty" approach. You are an amazing person so this one should be easy. OK here goes...."You have the most insightful and beautiful soul. You approach our lives with such loving and care. You make everything perfect. You shine on my life and brighten my day. Be my Valentine and the sun will always bring light to my life". Oh that is lame isn't it? It is all true for sure, but it certainly doesn't hit the mark. You will almost certainly answer "no" with that one. I need a lucky 21 - I need a "yes".
How about your sense of humor. It has always been what attracts me the most to you anyway. A sentiment that covers that and gets you to be my valentine ought to be simple enough. This is it..."You bring laughter and joy to my life. You make me smile. You warm my heart with your smiles. Be my Valentine and I will always have a smile on my face." Ugh. You know, your kind of funny just doesn't really translate to a Valentine card. I think you are already thinking "no". I need to act fast to get my "yes".
It turns out that Hallmark place must be on to something. 3,500 sentiments must be hard to do. They are trying to think and feel for someone else. I tried honey, I just can't do the "Hallmark" thing. They are flat out good at it and I guess I should give them more credit. Wait! I have an idea. A sentiment so simple it just might work. One that Hallmark themselves can't pull off.
Wow it is perfect. So simple, so pure, so to the point. I think it works.
So the real question becomes.....Will you be my valentine? I'll hold my breath just a little until you answer.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world.
You know I am not a fan of the "hallmark holidays". Personally I think the scheduled giving of the cards is a relatively lame way to show affection. A good randomly sent card for very little reason seems so much more appropriate and requires so much more thought. Valentines cards seem to be just a little bit different though. I gather it is an acceptable card giving holiday because in that card you are trying to express some kind of true feelings of love. I did some research and it hasn't always been that way.
Valentines cards started showing up in the 1800's. They were generally made by artists and showed pictures of children playing and gardens. The best part is that they were blank inside so that the sender could add his own sentiment. In 1913 the Hallmark Company took the "sentiment" part as its very own. Seems that today they have nearly 3,500 different Valentines sentiments. So I figured they had the perfect sentiment for me to share with you. Why make art when you can steal it right?
Well I read all 3,500 of them. Cover to cover. All 3,500. You may seem a roughly $8,000 charge on the checking account because they made me buy every one of them before I read them, but it is for a good reason so the charge is acceptable. And after all of that you know what I found out? They can't come up with the "perfect" sentiment for our relationship. In addition, I didn't want to risk them to breaking my 20 year streak of having you say "yes". So I had to come up with one on my own.
I figure I need a theme of some kind. Lets see.... We could go with your "outer beauty". How about something like "Your beauty is unparalleled. I could spend the rest of my life gazing into your amazing blue/gray eyes. Your smile creates a thousand faces, each more sparkling than the last. Be my Valentine so I can be a part of your beauty forever". You know what? As pretty as I think you are (and I still think you are the most beautiful thing ever) - that just doesn't cut it for me. With that one you still may say "no". I need a "yes".
Maybe we will go with the "inner beauty" approach. You are an amazing person so this one should be easy. OK here goes...."You have the most insightful and beautiful soul. You approach our lives with such loving and care. You make everything perfect. You shine on my life and brighten my day. Be my Valentine and the sun will always bring light to my life". Oh that is lame isn't it? It is all true for sure, but it certainly doesn't hit the mark. You will almost certainly answer "no" with that one. I need a lucky 21 - I need a "yes".
How about your sense of humor. It has always been what attracts me the most to you anyway. A sentiment that covers that and gets you to be my valentine ought to be simple enough. This is it..."You bring laughter and joy to my life. You make me smile. You warm my heart with your smiles. Be my Valentine and I will always have a smile on my face." Ugh. You know, your kind of funny just doesn't really translate to a Valentine card. I think you are already thinking "no". I need to act fast to get my "yes".
It turns out that Hallmark place must be on to something. 3,500 sentiments must be hard to do. They are trying to think and feel for someone else. I tried honey, I just can't do the "Hallmark" thing. They are flat out good at it and I guess I should give them more credit. Wait! I have an idea. A sentiment so simple it just might work. One that Hallmark themselves can't pull off.
Here it is....
"Be my Valentine because I love you more every day."Wow it is perfect. So simple, so pure, so to the point. I think it works.
So the real question becomes.....Will you be my valentine? I'll hold my breath just a little until you answer.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
A "Super" Bowl Day
The Super Bowl has kind of become a holiday of sorts in our country. A day when people throw big parties, have large gatherings, eat copious amounts of food and often celebrate their teams win (or in our case a few years ago a loss). What I realized on Sunday was that it has also, like any holiday, become about family. That part is what made my Super Bowl Sunday so "super".
The day started much like any other Sunday. Woke up, got my coffee, picked up a paper, etc. The younger daughter had to run off to work pretty early and I had an errand to run of my own. So unlike some other Sunday's a lot was accomplished early in the day. Luckily the early start paid off. It paid off big.
The day was set up pretty well the week prior. You really have no idea how shocked I was about the TV purchase. 50 inches of TV viewing genius. Further shock hit me when the sound system was added. Seems extravagant for something that originated because we wanted a better WII Bowling experience. However, it helped everything come together. I was pretty excited to watch the big game and we had spent considerable time in the basement watching the new TV or playing WII in the days leading up to the big game.
At around 1PM I picked up the younger daughter from work. With our grocery list in hand we picked up the goods for our Super Bowl "party". We also picked up stuff for dinner. I am always flattered when you guys want something for dinner that I cook. I am not sure you really understand why I like to cook so much, but I really do. So much of what I do for a living isn't tangible. Whatever I do at work isn't so much for me but for someone else. Cooking is something I can do and see my accomplishment when I am done. It must be a "guy" thing. I get the same feeling when I mow the lawn. I mean really, why would I always say "hey the grass looks good" after I mow it? really who cares right? Anyway that the younger daughter had a craving for a meal I cook had me a little excited. I really wanted to make it for her. Even if it meant "interrupting" the Super Bowl.
We got back around 2PM and we all kind of headed into the basement. You settled in on the couch. Tired from our night out. You always look so pretty when you sleep. When you so peacefully nap in the middle of the day, you look even more beautiful.
The younger one and I started playing MarioCart. Frankly I suck at that game. Suck pretty bad. However, I haven't had so much fun with her in a long time. We raced nearly every track. She won almost every race (technically she always beat me, but her real foe become the *other* racers). We laughed quite a bit. Yelling at the WII for doing things like blowing us up, or falling into the abyss or getting oiled and not being able to see while drove. We played for almost 2 hours. You woke up (or maybe we woke you - still not clear on that) about halfway through. You watched us and at points even cheered her on to victory (OK it was subtle cheering but I saw you pulling for her). We had a really good time.
The you and her went upstairs to bring down the snacks. wee have certainly had more elaborate Super Bowl spreads in the past. But on this particular one I didn't need any more than we had. The 3 of us sat down there watched the pre-game and munched away. We were all horrified at the "presidential" interview before the game, we discussed the game that was about to be played and just hung out together.
The game started boring enough but for some reason we all stayed down there watching almost every minute of it. The younger daughter seemed more interested in the game that usual. She asked lots of questions about why they would call timeout or run a particular play. You joined right in and we had some pretty good foot ball talk going on for a while. The game kind of ebbed and flowed and we even debated the controversial 100 yard return that took place just before the half ended.
At half time I went up and started dinner. I am not sure what you guys did downstairs the whole time, but I could hear you talking about something. I missed watching the halftime show, but when I got back downstairs you filled me in on the details. So even though all I did was hear the halftime show, I felt like I saw it anyway. Eventually dinner was ready and we all sat down to eat. Once we finished I did the dishes so i could get back downstairs as quickly as I could.
The game wound up being pretty exciting and we all watched the finish together. Towards the end you started chatting with the older daughter. I was quite touched to hear she was rooting for the Steeler because "Daddy likes the Steelers". I was on the fence up to that point (grandfathers team versus the ultimate underdog - big dilemma), but after that comment I WAY on the Steelers side. In the end they pulled it off and we all came away winners.
The after what seemed like a 4 hour post game (the younger daughter must have thought it was 10 hours) the 3 of us watched the new episode of the "The Office" together. We all laughed so hard. It was one of the best episodes ever ("the fire is shooting at us"). Then the younger daughter gave me a kiss and went off to bed. We soon followed and Super Bowl Sunday was over.
I guess all of this seems like rambling. But what struck me afterwards (actually on my flight to MSP) was what a great day it was for us as a family. We spent nearly 9 hours in the basement together. We enjoyed ourselves together. It probably wasn't all that important, but to me it just illustrates what a great family we have. With one already off at college, you have to make every moment with the younger one count. It was so nice that we could have such a nice and somewhat impromptu day together. We make lots of big memories for the kids. Things like vacations, big events, Christmas, etc. But I think what we will ultimately remember are the millions of little memories we have made.
So this is going to go down as one of my favorite Super Bowls. It really was a "super" day. Thanks sweetie, without you the day wouldn't never have happened. You have nearly 20 years of building this family. It remains your greatest accomplishment.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world. (I like the combination - nice call).
The day started much like any other Sunday. Woke up, got my coffee, picked up a paper, etc. The younger daughter had to run off to work pretty early and I had an errand to run of my own. So unlike some other Sunday's a lot was accomplished early in the day. Luckily the early start paid off. It paid off big.
The day was set up pretty well the week prior. You really have no idea how shocked I was about the TV purchase. 50 inches of TV viewing genius. Further shock hit me when the sound system was added. Seems extravagant for something that originated because we wanted a better WII Bowling experience. However, it helped everything come together. I was pretty excited to watch the big game and we had spent considerable time in the basement watching the new TV or playing WII in the days leading up to the big game.
At around 1PM I picked up the younger daughter from work. With our grocery list in hand we picked up the goods for our Super Bowl "party". We also picked up stuff for dinner. I am always flattered when you guys want something for dinner that I cook. I am not sure you really understand why I like to cook so much, but I really do. So much of what I do for a living isn't tangible. Whatever I do at work isn't so much for me but for someone else. Cooking is something I can do and see my accomplishment when I am done. It must be a "guy" thing. I get the same feeling when I mow the lawn. I mean really, why would I always say "hey the grass looks good" after I mow it? really who cares right? Anyway that the younger daughter had a craving for a meal I cook had me a little excited. I really wanted to make it for her. Even if it meant "interrupting" the Super Bowl.
We got back around 2PM and we all kind of headed into the basement. You settled in on the couch. Tired from our night out. You always look so pretty when you sleep. When you so peacefully nap in the middle of the day, you look even more beautiful.
The younger one and I started playing MarioCart. Frankly I suck at that game. Suck pretty bad. However, I haven't had so much fun with her in a long time. We raced nearly every track. She won almost every race (technically she always beat me, but her real foe become the *other* racers). We laughed quite a bit. Yelling at the WII for doing things like blowing us up, or falling into the abyss or getting oiled and not being able to see while drove. We played for almost 2 hours. You woke up (or maybe we woke you - still not clear on that) about halfway through. You watched us and at points even cheered her on to victory (OK it was subtle cheering but I saw you pulling for her). We had a really good time.
The you and her went upstairs to bring down the snacks. wee have certainly had more elaborate Super Bowl spreads in the past. But on this particular one I didn't need any more than we had. The 3 of us sat down there watched the pre-game and munched away. We were all horrified at the "presidential" interview before the game, we discussed the game that was about to be played and just hung out together.
The game started boring enough but for some reason we all stayed down there watching almost every minute of it. The younger daughter seemed more interested in the game that usual. She asked lots of questions about why they would call timeout or run a particular play. You joined right in and we had some pretty good foot ball talk going on for a while. The game kind of ebbed and flowed and we even debated the controversial 100 yard return that took place just before the half ended.
At half time I went up and started dinner. I am not sure what you guys did downstairs the whole time, but I could hear you talking about something. I missed watching the halftime show, but when I got back downstairs you filled me in on the details. So even though all I did was hear the halftime show, I felt like I saw it anyway. Eventually dinner was ready and we all sat down to eat. Once we finished I did the dishes so i could get back downstairs as quickly as I could.
The game wound up being pretty exciting and we all watched the finish together. Towards the end you started chatting with the older daughter. I was quite touched to hear she was rooting for the Steeler because "Daddy likes the Steelers". I was on the fence up to that point (grandfathers team versus the ultimate underdog - big dilemma), but after that comment I WAY on the Steelers side. In the end they pulled it off and we all came away winners.
The after what seemed like a 4 hour post game (the younger daughter must have thought it was 10 hours) the 3 of us watched the new episode of the "The Office" together. We all laughed so hard. It was one of the best episodes ever ("the fire is shooting at us"). Then the younger daughter gave me a kiss and went off to bed. We soon followed and Super Bowl Sunday was over.
I guess all of this seems like rambling. But what struck me afterwards (actually on my flight to MSP) was what a great day it was for us as a family. We spent nearly 9 hours in the basement together. We enjoyed ourselves together. It probably wasn't all that important, but to me it just illustrates what a great family we have. With one already off at college, you have to make every moment with the younger one count. It was so nice that we could have such a nice and somewhat impromptu day together. We make lots of big memories for the kids. Things like vacations, big events, Christmas, etc. But I think what we will ultimately remember are the millions of little memories we have made.
So this is going to go down as one of my favorite Super Bowls. It really was a "super" day. Thanks sweetie, without you the day wouldn't never have happened. You have nearly 20 years of building this family. It remains your greatest accomplishment.
Baby you're the world to me and I love you more than anything in the world. (I like the combination - nice call).
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